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“How much ya bench?”

When I was back in high school, what now seems like a million years ago, my high school offered a couple of different options for the required physical education courses.

The “gym” class was always the great equalizer among the freaks and geeks, the jocks and the needs and very one in between. There was no “honors” gym, as the adjective itself seemed in complete contrast to the spirit of the affair. Going to Staten Island’s largest high school (my graduating class was 303, I was 27th), gave a big mix to this melting pot of people you’d end up with in gym class.

And, given the NYC Board of Educations continual budget crises, gym activities were simple in scope. Basketball. Softball in the summer. Touch football. Soccer. The equipment provided was barebones. Usually a ball. Maybe some cones. But, the most interesting were the people. The superseniors. The superduperseniors (I remember one kid in my junior gym class was 21, and a peer). The kids who had pledged themselves to ROTC and to fight for America. Having been in “gifted” classes for basically my entire education, these tended not to be the people I saw often. Whereas, getting a B or a C in a class, or getting just a 3 on an AP exam was a big deal to “us”, “life” was just more difficult for them. And at the time, I had barely an understanding of what “life” really was - I was by no means “rich”, but my parents had never made me want for anything either. At the same time, I was really lucky to be the first in my family to graduate college.

But what I think about now is these people, and how the gym class created these unlikely friendships, playing on the same pick up teams day after day. Over gym. I wonder what’s become of them. I wonder if they ever think of me. And I wonder if the hand life dealt them ever got better. And I am again thankful for who I am, and what I’ve been allowed to be. And I realize, as I only begun to understand then, that I wasn’t “better” than them. That there’s no way to know how I would have gotten through “life” - in real terms.

And then, I again believe in the power of people. That “life” is the great equalizer, that the “melting pot” had taught me more than I realized at the time.

Just a thought.

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RIP Roi. And Thanks.

Today I was extremely saddened to hear the news of the passing of Dave Matthews Band saxophonist LeRoi Moore from complications from an ATV accident.  He was just 46 years old.

Like so many things, I found out the news through Twitter Search which had LeRoi Moore as a trending topic, and sadly, this usually indicates that they’ve died.

I’ve been a fan of Dave Matthews Band for my years.  I’ve probably seen them more than 20 times live, and while ducking the pot-smoke (I was probably one of the few actually NOT smoking), and the crazy teenagers, I never had anything other than a great time watching them.  Their unique blend of guitar, bass, drums, fiddle and sax created a sound unlike any other band in the world. My love for DMB blossomed at a time when music was an incredibly important part of my life, and my affection for the joy they brought me will not be forgotten.

On stage, LeRoi would never go anywhere without wearing his sunglasses.  He would lay down amazing sax riffs for songs such as “Lover Lay Down”, “Stay”, “Too Much”, and was a great flute player, offering flute fills for “Say Goodbye” and a host of other songs. The photo above was taken from a 2000 show at Giants Stadium, where, if you look hard enough, you can see LeRoi without his sunglasses. This, was a momentous moment indeed.

On his off time from Dave Matthews Band, he was part of a jazz project called Code Magenta with Greg Howard and Dawn Thompson, a collaboration that resulted in a EP released in 2002.

His bio on davematthewsband.com talks about his love of jazz, and how his life in Dave Matthews Band is almost better than a jazz gig.

Most of all, he was a nice guy.  He did a lot for the fans, put himself out there, and always was a gentleman and a true lover of his craft.  During a taping of Vh1 Storytellers in 2005, LeRoi talked about his family, and along with Carter Beauford (DMB’s drummer), talked about how family made their tour lives possible and how much all of the band meant to each other, and how much the band meant to him.

Last night, the band played a sold out show at LA’s Staples Center, and Dave Matthews paid tribute to his lost friend:

“We all had some bad news today,” Matthews told the sell-out crowd at the Staples Center in Los Angeles after the first song. “Our good friend LeRoi Moore passed on and gave his ghost up today and we will miss him forever.”

Fans shouted Moore’s name in tribute as the band resumed playing. Two songs later, Matthews once again made reference to Moore, saying: “It’s easier to leave than be left.”

Similiarly, the DMB crew, on a tour blog updated nightly, encapsulated their thoughts in an entry:

As we sat this afternoon contemplating the loss of our brother, we wondered how we could possibly do a show today. Dave put it into perspective stating, “There’s no place I’d rather be than here with you guys right now.” We cherish special memories of our lost friend. Tonight, Dave told a story about LeRoi at a bar in Virginia where the cash register was near the stage and LeRoi leaned on the register because “standing had become a chore”. Roi proceeded to play the most beautiful version of Somewhere Over The Rainbow. Dave said, “that was the day I fell in love with him. And I’m still in love with him.” It’s safe to say we all were in love with him. “It’s always easier to leave, than to be left.” -DM

Today, Dave Matthews Band, their fans and crew paid tribute to the lost, through a simple photo on davematthewsband.com

My heart is heavy as I write this. R.I.P. Roi and thanks for all of the great times and music. You will be missed.

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Now I know why they call it Whole Wallet

When I had the pleasure of moving down to Long Island City, last November, I was excited by a bunch of things.   A great new apartment.  An amazing view.   The chance to live with my girlfriend.   The chance to leave Staten Island for good.   The great commute to a new job.   It was a winter of new beginnings.  *pause for contented sigh*.   But, life in Hunter’s Point was quiet.  Too quiet.  The only grocery option within walking distance was the Korean Deli on Vernon Boulevard.   Lucky as we were, we had a car, and we could scurry off to the Super Stop and Shop about 10 minutes drive away (a few weeks after we moved in, a lucky trip to the closest Best Buy revealed it across the street).

But we wanted a walking city.  The early buzz included a  “gourmet supermarket”.  The “pharmacy”.  The “gourmet coffee” shop.   Opening soon.  February.  Definitely.

So, we fought through a cold winter (the drawback of the waterside view is the fact that the winter winds slice you like a Ginsu knife), and waited.   The supermarket vendor was announced - it would be an Amish Market.   Great.  I was in favor of paying a little more for the convenience, and for well-made quality food.   This would bridge the gap between making sandwiches, and $40 Thai delivery.  February came.  And went.  May, we were told.  Definitely May.

Meanwhile, the year before, the “gourmet coffee” shop was rumored to be, no surprise, a Starbucks.   March came, and the plans for the Starbucks were axed.  Soon enough, it was more than just that Starbucks that were axed.  The local coffee vendor, the Brasil Coffee House, would fight to live on another day.

Fast forward to March.  Some movement proffered hope. The restaurant space on the first floor - revealed as an unfortunately titled Asian Fusion restaurant.

And then, all of a sudden, it was happening.  Signs adorned the windows now-dubbed “Market at Long Island City”.  Not an Amish Market brand, mind you, but still by the same company.  The huge concrete floor was slowly filled up. Next door, the “pharmacy” was revealed as a Duane Reade.   We were cooking now.

So, imagine my utter excitement when it was finally announced that August 13th would be the day.  The supermarket, was to be called foodcellar&co. Oh happy day!

So, sure enough, morning of August 13th, just before work, I popped in. Beautiful. Huge. Stupendous. Wonderful. It was like food Disneyland. That first morning, I got some bananas and a Mount Fuji Apple Fizzy Lizzy. No time to really look around, but I’d be back later.

So when my girlfriend and I returned later that night to score dinner, we hit up the fresh made Brick Oven Pizza bar, and enjoyed amazing pizza. About $10 each. Not too bad, mind you, considering an inferior pie from Domino’s would have fit the bill. This was leisure shopping at it’s finest, and we ended up getting a bunch of other stuff. Then the total came to $90, and we started to wonder a little bit. What the hell did we buy for $70? And then we started to figure out the average price of our organic, all natural, preservative free items was somewhere around $4 each. And when you get 10-15 things that average $4 each… you hit that $60 total really quickly. But that was ok. In the heat of the moment, and the urge to support this new supermarket, I was willing to eat the price (and for the record, all of the rest of the products we had were delicious, and well-made). I looked past the eye-dropping $8.39 for a half-gallon of organic orange juice and picked up good old Tropicana for $4.59 (For the record, in any other supermarket, I’d never paid more than $3.99 for this, and often it was $3 or less. But that’s the volume game I suppose).

Fast forward two days. And we had to do some dinner shopping for my parents who were coming by the next morning. We challenged ourselves to make a great meal. So, we picked up some organic free-range chicken. Got some pasta and such, salad and dressing (this place’s produce will not be beat - it’s really top shelf), and some other odds and ends, and the total… $102. $102?.

So, what happened? The combination of the lower-volume organic products, combined with the dearth of national brands (the only one I could find was Domino sugar), make the prices really high, and the selection really different for someone not used to this. Years of regular supermarket shopping had not prepared me for this sort of thing. New brands. 3x the price. But it was all “good for you”, right? I understand an adjustment period for this new style of store, but I was hoping somewhat closer to Trader Joe’s in terms of prices. But, man, for wanting to really make this place a staple of my life, but, I simply can’t afford to do it. I’m not alone. This place just totally screwed with my “value per dollar barometer”.

The Duane Reade is about ready to open. The Asian Fusion restaurant is already taking take out orders. But, why oh why am I so sad by how my beloved supermarket came out. I’m going to give it a shot, sure and it’s only been 5 days. Is this what Whole Foods is like? Do I need to pay more money for better food? Why is this stuff all priced so high? How come good food can’t be cheaper?

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The battle for who could care less

The rapture is coming.

And, at the risk of being alarmist, the truth is that it’s coming in a way many of us have never seen. This rapture manifests itself in the battle for the discovery of the self - one fought by historians, psychologists, sociologists, comedians, musicians and ordinary people.

The fundamental and most basic question of “who am I?” is now fought on two planes - the online and the “real life”, and the lines blur so constantly, so as to threaten life itself!

Well, not quite. But the truth is that what defines us as people online, is becoming a burden on those who dwell within the ranks of social media sites and networks.

I call this burden “avatar exhaustion”.   The “avatar” we hide behind online, and through the words we write, the objects we share, has started to become such a part of daily life that the once solid line between “real” and “online” is becoming ever more difficult to comprehend. And the battle to be “someone” online, often takes unforeseen victims.

Combine this with the fact that there are just so many places to be online; dozens and dozens of social networks, communities, forums, bulletin boards, blog networks, microblogging sites, streaming sites, sharing sites, most modern Internet users have to manage three totally different and often completely disparate instances of the “self” (”home”, “work” and “online”). And, to increasing numbers of people I’ve spoken with about this - it’s utterly exhausting.

This shuffling subjects the brain is subject to an increasing number of mental calculations, analysis of interpersonal relationships, caution in speaking and sharing, degrees of openness and worse of all, time management.

The debate between managing your online and offline lives becomes even more difficult considering the fact that everyone seems to be connected, most of which have real-time web access and SMS alerts.  The conversation time with offline loved ones is not as sacred anymore.

When I got my first BlackBerry, probably around 7 years ago, the novelty of always-on and instant e-mail was a cool one.  I didn’t have to interface with a full computer to communicate, and it fed the impulsive nature of information adoption and consumption.   This was “cool”, as in I would be the first to know what’s going on, and would be able to inform conversation and decision making.   But this was largely e-mail, SMS wasn’t yet popular in the United States, and turning off the Blackberry just meant a pause from work, and the home life wasn’t really as affected.  Sure, it was annoying to answer an e-mail in personal life, but these were one-off dialogues that usually took mere seconds.

But now, with the rise of Facebook, and Twitter and other social networks, it’s gone from “always-on” work, to “always-on” life.   The Truman Show analogy not withstanding, it’s extremely difficult to turn off the “online” life, since now, the “online” life has met the “work” life in many cases, and the only one left, the “home” life begins to suffer.   And so, “the battle for who could care less” (thank you, Ben Folds Five), is “always-on” too.  This battle involves real-time prioritzation of tasks, people and results at a blistering pace, and those who “care less” in this analysis, usually lose to those who would “care more” at that given moment.    These interactions all contribute to “who you are” - but which bucket (”personal”, “work” or “online) they fall into - grossly unclear.

Now, even with the never-ending pace of technology, some immortal truths remain.  We have a limited amount of hours in the day.  Our brain can only handle so much.  Human nature remains pretty much the same.  People tend not to react terribly differently when we present them with the same situation.

So, what do we do? How do you handle “avatar exhaustion” - does it take you away from what you love? Is it really possible to unplug?

I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments.

Posted in Random Randomness | 9 Comments »

Selling out was easy to do

So, I sold out.

In record time I might add. Some of you may have read the last post on this blog where I, rather flippantly, mind you, railed against the need to buy a new iPhone. And in the end, the verdict was, and I quote “no thanks”.

So, here we are a few weeks later, and I again am typing a blog post on the WordPress iPhone app, but this time it’s on a white 16GB iPhone 3G. And, yes, it’s mine. So that obviously means between now and then, I bought one (2 actually).

So, what changed?

Supply became available. Rather than waiting 3, 4 or 5 hours (at one of the Apple Stores), or 2 to 3 weeks (by ordering through AT&T), I was able to get on the line at Apple Fifth Avenue, with a voucher guaranteeing me an iPhone within 40 minutes of arriving. No sweating it out. (didn’t hurt that it was a nice day)

The promise of bug fixes was close. Rumors and facts had Apple working on both a point release (2.0.1) and a major release (2.1) imminently. And sure enough, 2.0.1 was released two days later.

The price was right. Even at $299 for a 16GB (and yes the contract), I got a much better phone one year later.

First Gen resale value. If I was going to get any value for my now 8GB iPhone Touches, it would have to be within their window of most value (I.e. Before Apple’s third gen iPhone).

The marketing wins. Apple manufactures demand, and I buy it every time.

So, am I happy? Yes. And it really does more with the little things the unit fixes. Better sound quality. Better speaker. Non-recessed headphone jack. The 3g when it works is awesome. And yes, the fact that I can store most of my music on it again helps too.

Am I a sellout? Sure. But I’m also happy I am - because this is the phone the first-gen should have been.

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